I am a harsh believer that life experiences add nuances to one's sexuality or sexual identity. If you have children one is deemed less homosexual, or if you are married outside of your sexual orientation you are minimalized. When I am with a male partner I do not identify as straight, nor do I identify as lesbian when I am with women, every day and moment, I am pansexual. Sexuality is about how one feels, and it is merely up to you, do not let societal stigmas change that narrative for you.
Firstly, pan-sexual, does not mean that a person is attracted to “bread” (since “pan” translates to bread or sweet bread in Spanish) or any type of loaf, croissant, for that matter. My family had a field day with bread puns, and my sexuality for that entire year, the year I came out. The prefix, pan- refers to “all” — an attraction to all genders. Merriam-Webster dictionary defines pansexuality as a “sexual desire or attraction that is not limited to people of a particular gender identity or sexual orientation.” The term, pansexual, first originated by Austrian neurologist and psychoanalyst, Sigmund Freud, he denoted, “that the sex instinct plays the primary part in all human activity, mental and physical.” Pansexuality, pansexual, or omnisexuality, a sexual orientation, references a person who is attracted to all genders or in other words —loves within the boundaries of “hearts not parts”. As a pansexual person, it seems that there are still misconceptions surrounding this sexual identity/orientation. One of them is that pan people are viewed as being hypersexual because of their vast range of attractions towards different people or folx, not all pansexuals are attracted to every person they may see or meet on a personal level.
Sexual identity is the label that a person might use to let others know who they are as a sexual being. Whether an individual identifies as gay, lesbian, bisexual, homosexual, heterosexual, or omnisexual is determined by their self-identification. The popularity of pansexual identities seems to be more mainstream over the past few years, and continues to grow through LGBTQIA+ culture & TV media. We are all prone to understanding pansexuality, even through famous idols like Demi Lovato or Miley Cyrus, and their openness to sharing such confidential information.
Bisexual Does Not = Pansexual
Despite many notorious celebrities coming-out and voicing their truths, the sad reality is that being “pansexual” is still strongly misunderstood and nontraditional within the population. Firstly, it is not an “experimentation” phase, it is a valid and genuine identity. Of course, not everyone who identifies as pansexual may use the term, some folx will use bisexual interchangeably, and guess what? That is totally fine! Why? Because this is how you take gender out of the seduction equation. In the following article, “ Defining Bisexuality: Young Bisexual and Pansexual People's Voices'' — it covers the lived experiences from various individuals, and how they each perceive either, bisexuality or pansexuality, and “specific attractions or behaviors'' linked to either. The findings revealed how people may experience amorous fluidity, and for some people it will not be equal; however, for others it may be similar, it varies by person.
I thought I was bisexual, until I fell in love with a person who identified as a non-binary person. In my eyes, they were a regular tomboyish person, whose attire was skinny jeans, Dr. Martens, & oversized t-shirts. It never dawned on me how they just wanted to “fit” this ideal they were used to their entire life. Being with them pushed my limits, because although they identified as queer they opened up to the possibility of being transgender, yet cultural norms left them diminishing that form of identity. They ascertained the sexual orientation of “fluid” —which means just that, to kinda “go with the flow” in terms of who they find good-looking or spark an attraction with. Hayfield and Křížová (2021) denote the notion that pansexual occurrences are uncomparable to other plurisexual (plural sexual identities); therefore, it may be beneficial if more studies centered around this topic were explored more in depth.
The “P” word
Oftentimes, pansexuality is mistaken for the other “p” word connected to the sexuality realm, polyamorous or polyamory. Polyamory, in a nutshell, means that people have mutually committed to a non-monogamous relationship that may be sexual or romantic in nature. This mutual agreement is decided by both partners and they each date extensively; whereas, polygamy, is solely for one partner to take on multiple lovers. However, there are limits to folx that identify as both, pansexual and polyamorous or simply polyamorous or pansexual.
Our final “p” word, covered in this blog, is plurisexual, as mentioned above, an umbrella term I was not familiar with until I rummaged around researching extensively on the topic of pansexuality and the connection it holds to society. Plurisexual, “...refers to individuals who are, or who have the potential to be, attracted to more than one gender, [such as], identities including bisexual, pansexual and fluid, therefore fall under the category plurisexual.”
Despite there being discrimination in some forms; it is evident to push societal norms and love who you wanna love or date on/off the spectrum. Pansexuality as a sexual orientation is a way to celebrate sexuality and gender inclusivity on a broad spectrum. First in the sense that sexual partners could identify on limitless variations, and also through authentic recognition and respect that pansexual people deserve. In honor of Pride month, here I am, just one of many, waving my pansexual flag, composed of hot-pink, aqua, and golden hues— ecstatic to be part of this vibrant community!
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